牛刀

工作一切如常, 没有甚麼驚喜, 亦都没有太多的驚嚇.

開始小試牛刀,才覺得萬事眞喺開頭難,以前總喺對做老闆嘅朋輩有着諸多嘅良言. 但現下,經歷了只喺好初步的計劃, 已經疲惫不已. 經過一輪的勞碌先突然感覺到以前的良言其實喺幼稚得可以!

理論不經實踐總只是理論. 再次要勉勵自己, 失敗乃成功之母. 希望再接再勵!

談判心理學

讀書時因貪玩同埋聽人講心理學又易讀易攞高分,所以讀咗科101, 不過因資質有限, 係好玩, 但就冇セ記性, D嘢水過鴨背, 分就攞唔到高, 不過印象中因睇到好多實例, 都幾好玩.

硬係書到用時方恨少, 最近有D談判嘅機會, 不過就硬係覺得自己太緊張, 太wordy, 唔係太捉到對方嘅思路. 唔知係咪人老咗, 諗嘅嘢同眞係講嘅嘢總係有D唔協條. 曾經有過西人同仕話曾經睇過同參加過Ｄtraining, 佢而家可以人哋問佢一條佢唔喺好識答嘅問題, 但佢仍可以提出10種唔同嘅方案去buy多Ｄ嘅時間去come up with個solution. sigh... 呢Ｄ未喺強人囉!

Back to the zone

After a week of pure relaxation, coming back to work is definitely a drag. But oh well, this is life, I supposed.

I'd like to share some thoughts about interviews. Our company is currently looking for 'associate' developer, a nicer name for a Junior, I supposed, and I was amazed by how good quality of the candidates were by looking at their resume. If I were to be brutally honest, I felt kinda intimated by them. The applicants that we've seen so far all have Master degree, and all of them have real work experience as well, they are all in their 30s.

I think sitting at the interviewer side of the table should definitely benefit me if I ever attempt to be on the other side. From 'this side', I've got to pay more attention to the other side of the table. Not sure if the metro-side of me got into the way, but the first thing I found myself curious to see was the first impression. Did they dress appropriately? Did they know how to do the handshake? And then of course, in the killing boring technical questions part of the interview, how good they hit the points, how well they carried themselves when they didn't understand the question. And how they showed their logical thinkings when they were asked problem solving type of questions.

I kinda have interview phobic; always dream that I would say the most stupid or ridiculous thing in an interview. And this is probably one of the reasons why I am so 'loyal' to the company. :) So... sitting on this side of the table kinda makes me wonder how well I can do on the other side.

Bum - Day 2

第2日做bum, 感覺上,已經減少咗D睙氣. MBTI話我喺extravert, 自己覺得喺啱, 因為覺得自已enjoy being注意嘅中心. 但MBTI亦都有話intravert要時間避世. 睇怕我應該喺強迫性外向嘅typical IT人.

開始要全面計劃將來, 工字不出頭, 不過出咗頭好似會變咗個土字...

最近睇緊一本関於公関嘅書, "成功心戰兵法", 喺對作者毫不認識之下, 決定投資一下時間讀番本久違咗嘅中文書. 啱啱開始揭咗幾頁, 居然有被drawn in嘅感覺, 睇來我嘅中文俾我想像中好.

Bum - Day 1

Another intensed Sprint is finished, I'm again exhausted. So I took a week off, just want to be a complete bum for the week, just to relax and enjoy some quality time with all the people I care and love.

So here comes day one of being a bum! But as usual, checked email first thing in the morning, and saw some intensed discussion threads, so had to jump in and cleared up a few things. Then I realized that was quite dangerous cuz work can easily suck time as we all know!

...

Dine out for lunch, mall, playland, costco! The usual weekend stuff, but for some reason, I was really digging it! Though, occasionally, I saw some young couples or young fellows were doing the similar things in a restaurant, or in the shopping mall, and then I was thinking... hmm... Vancouver does have lots of unemployed people or rich people, or maybe stressed dudes like myself. :)

Reflection

Although this seems it has nothing to do with work tactics, this is something that hit me and potentially would affect my outlook in life.

I was reading a referred blog entry the other day. A few clicks lead me to a blog whose owner had just committed a suicide. Knowing that the blogger has passed away, reading her works kinda made me quite uncomfortable. So I just skimmed through a few lines, but I can already felt the sadness and darkness from her words. This kinda shocked me. I enjoy writing a lot, partly because I can freely express my feeling without too much of the boundary, and I thought it actually helped me in releasing my stress. But I seem to have a second thought about this theory now. After one second of google, I find this suicide list for writers.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Category:Writers_who_committed_suicide

Sweat shop

Sweat shop is a term that I've been thinking a lot lately. I used to enjoy coming to work a lot. Not only because I loved what I did, but also I loved the people I was working with. Coming to work was such a blessing! Occasionally, I would think that I might end up having lots of girl friends if I didn't enjoy working so much(well, I love this thinking. :)).

But those days have gone. Now, it's such a drag for me to come to work every day. I would completely lose my appetite if I ever think about work related stuff when I am home eating, or dining out. Is it the work that I hate? is it the person that I am working with? or is it just me? my aging? my responsibilities surrounding me on a whole?

I dunno, I need a break! screw the politics, screw the works, screw everything! I just want to relax and chill, and have quality time with my beloved family members.

窮則變,變則通

唔知點解哩個世界總係有D ego maniac嘅人, 自以為地球為佢而轉, 有意無意之中, 總有種侍勢凌人, 咄咄逼人嘅氣勢. 遇到哩D人, 心總喺覺得厭煩至極, 仲成日要對口對面, 少一點耐性, 都分分鐘會火山爆發. 哎, 如果唔喺睇錢份上, 第一個走嘅一定喺我. 不過謀定而後動睇怕亦會喺新年計劃之中啦.

睇到sammy兄嘅post, 提到做嘢嘅心態喺成家立室之後變咗,變得積極咗. 睇完總有點慚愧, 其實我亦經歷緊類似嘅path, 成咗家而女兒亦都呀呀學語, 但我嘅心態就點都積極不來, 總有點患得患失, 時而期待退休, 時而又躊躇滿志, 真有點不知所謂!

前幾日睇到思籌之路, 有少少感觸,関系網眞喺好重要, 自問若然公司大地震, 我一定冇可能先知先覺, 睇來眞喺要變變了! 希望眞喺可以窮則變,變則通啦!

iComplied

雖然一直喺哩間標榜住有上千萬用户的公司從事軟件開發, 但從來都唔覺間公司喺大公司, 直至到最近公司嘅CEO發出一個都幾好笑嘅電邮, 邮件中好婉轉咁提醒我哋一定要完成一個叫做'我依從'嘅課程, 否則有可能被辭退. 睇完邮件不禁啞然失笑, 終於有大公司feel啦!

哩個課程我諗最主要都喺要make sure員工同公司嘅價值觀aligned, 我估. 不過都幾ironic, 因為唔take唔知, 公司都幾有道德! 哈哈!!! 唔知喺咪所有美國上市公司都要粉釋道德呢? 諗落都幾搞笑...

Leadership and Democracy

Another lesson learned in 'The apprentice' show. Did I mention that I am a reality show junky? I guess this becomes very obvious.

In this week's Celebrity Apprentice show, Lennox Lewis (a Heavyweight-Boxing Champion) was a project lead. Piers(a Brit judge in the 'UK got talent', and 'American got talent') challenged his leadership because it seemed that everything that comes to a decision, Lennox would cast a vote. He called that democracy, but Piers called it incompetent, and lack of leadership.

To some degree, I agreed with Piers, but at the same time, I kinda feel for Lennox. The stuff that they were doing (task was to come up with a window play to promote Vera Wang & Serta Mattress) was definitely not one of his areas. So when you are dealing with something that's out of your element, would you not rather be extra careful? Going for the 'democratic' way may be the safest way to get the most popular decision. The main reason I agree with Piers is that all good leaders tend to be control-freaks. It's probably very hard for them to reach decision by casting votes. They would rather have a bad decision than letting others get into their way. But then a good leader would also need to listen to others, and take in the advice, digest and reach to the right decision.

Without subconsciously thinking about leadership, I think I might do the same thing as Lennox. Simply because doing something that is not in my element would somehow lower my confident level, hence, naturally want less responsibility. But when no one in the team is familiar with the area, I would for sure take the flame. Oh well, I guess the moral of the story is that how we can walk the fine line between democracy and have the right control.

Fake it till you make it

I first heard about this expression in 'The Apprentice' (The Martha Stewart version). The contender who expressed this line was immediately fired from that episode. I can't recall what happened, but I kinda wonder if that indeed is a workable Motto.

Being IN the real life for almost a decade now, I kinda wonder if this Motto is what majority of the population uses.

I think one of my biggest problems is that I can't fake. If I don't know something, I can never make it sound intelligent enough that people would buy it. However, I've seen some serious fakers, man, they can talk! But don't ever look down on these fakers, they usually are the key personels in the company. If they know they are the fakers, usually they would be flexible enough to let someone else take the league to push the project forward, and yet, they can fake it so good that others that are not in the loop would think they come up with the solution, hence, they will have promotions after promtions. I used to hate people like that, but lately, I've been thinking, maybe it's time for me to 'grow up'.

Working with the wrong crowds

A friend of mine has decided to go back to HK to further his education and will most likely stayput thereafter. I am happy for him that he finally moves forward and seems that he knows exactly what he wants. I wish him the best of luck, and it should be interesting to see how everything would turn out in a year or two.

I haven't really had time to bond with this friend for a long time, and since I'm very tired from all the weekend overtime, I decided to give myself a little break, so I called him up and arranged a lunch meet. We caught up a lot, and we also talked about his last job. He used to work for a very famous game company here in Vancouver. And he said that he realized that he was in the wrong path in his career 3 months after he started to work there, not only that he didn't really have the desire to do gaming, but also he just hated the whole gaming culture, he felt that he didn't belong there, and yet, he realized that it would do him no good if he quitted at that point. So he hung on to his job until he finished a game from start to end. He described that he had to work with a bunch of people that basically had nothing in common with, and that kinda get met thinking...

I think the situation that i'm currently in is quite similar to his case. The only difference is perhaps I have bigger drive to overcome the problem given the circumstances. So what do you do when you realize you are working with the wrong crowds? You become one of them? or you change them? It all boils down to the question of gain or lost. Do I gain more by becoming one of them? Or vise versa. From the current economic trend, I think stayput might have been the best move. Sigh...

歧視

好奇怪! 來到平陽咁耐, 感受到最明顯的歧視竟然喺從一位有着中文姓名的亞裔同仕, 口華! 眞喺頂住頂住!!! 眞喺唔明! 點解同一民族會對自己人有着咁不友善嘅態度, 頂! 好想請佢食mm mm 啊!

The solution isn't very tactical, is it?

Given that we are in the satellite office, and he is in the main office, with the glorious title, well, at least he is thinking that, I bet, I am not sure what I can do. I mean I can't really 'study' him, or, in a less scary term, 'get to know' him, how can I be tactical? 敵不動﹐ 我不動﹖ 問題是敵動﹐ 我點動﹖ 問題的徵結是歧視﹐ 亦或是其他﹖

後記。。。

午飯時間﹐ 讀到“君子”﹐ 實是令我汗顏﹐ 摘下以警效尤!

“
君子律己以嚴，待人以寬; 小人反之。
君子謙遜求知，小人自滿狂妄。謙虛受益，滿盈招損。

”

War zone II

Thanks for the comments. Binary muggle, I think it may take some explaining for my first ever blog entry(:wink: :wink:), so I decided to just add another entry instead of replying to the comment.

I think everyone might find their own unique way to get to the place where he/she wants. I'm just a bit down right now, or, should I say, a bit more close to the reality. Again, this is also depending on your point of view, or perspective. I guess what I am trying to say is that you can totally achieve to the place where you want to be in an absolute harmony way. But I am just not sure how that is possible.

Why I said it's a war zone though? I think binary muggle is absolutely right that we should at least know what we are fighting for. To me, it is the battle to gain more responsibilities and hence more power. Why is it a battle, you asked? That's a great question. Let's come back to that. Now, let's assume that it is a battle, then who would be the enemies? Could have been the "Workplace bullies"? office politics?? Or even, the inner you?! I dunno, it all depends on persons and situations. To me, anything that prevents me from getting to where I want would be obstacles. And there are obstacles that I can concur by just being good at what I do, and obstacles that I can't even see. The invisible obstacles can well be the mimes and traps that your enemies articulately set for you. The beauty of not recognizing that is of course you died/trapped for unknown reasons. And the beauty of acknowledging that is you've got to protect yourself! And is it enough that you protect yourself? I'll leave it to you to answer, but I can tell you it's definitely the 'must' quality that you have to have in order to survive and proceed in this corporate world. Maybe different people would use different term to describe this situation. But from the recent experience that I had in the past a year or two, it is a battle alright!

About 'success', it's hard to define, isn't it? And how do we measure success? By money? like binary muggle suggested? In general, possession of money is definitely one of the key measurements. There is a Chinese saying that money isn't everything, but without money, you can't achieve much. I, too, can list lots of examples that go against that saying. But seriously, nowadays, aren't we all more or less using amount of money to judge? But of course, money isn't the only measurement. How would I define success? That's a very good question, I am yet looking for that.

The war zone

Work place is a war zone. Only when you realize this is indeed the case, you are stepping towards to success. Only when you realize that you are in the war zone, out in the open, you would then have to learn how to protect yourself. Only when you are protected, you are then qualified to fight in the battle.

Readers, would you agree to the above? I've been out in the open field for many years, there were ups and downs. The Ups might have been some minor promotions, or even being the survivor after a major laid off. But those were never quite to the degree that I was once envisioning for. What went wrong? What's happening?!